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Mama told me there would be days like this. She just didn't tell me there would be so many #amreading #amwriting #blogging #romance #kindle #amazon

5/9/2015

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And Mom definitely didn't know, that her very calm and sane daughter would take a right turn at fifty and become an Indie Author. So mom gets a pass on not warning me about days like this. I wonder if readers realize how difficult it is to write, market, and stay positive on the days you are constantly getting hit by something that makes you want to toss in the towel or just cry. It's a good thing I'm a stubborn girl and not a quitter or I probably would have tossed in the towel ten months ago.

I think I've had more of those stop/re-examine decision moments in the past year than I have my entire life combined. Why am I doing this? It is no way for a grown woman to live? They hate me. They love me. Why the heck can't they just love me all the time. Where did my readers go? Oh, they're back and they love me again.  Indie Author/reader relationship is like that one you have with that super-neat guy, that isn't quite defined, you wonder if he'll call again, he does~big happy dance and excitement~ then  he says something at dinner that puts you back in the land of uncertainty, you worry for days, and then he calls again. Yep. That pretty much sums up my first year as an Indie Author.

If you think that the very great distance between the reader and the writer is so vast that there isn't a relationship and an emotional roller coaster for the writer, well you'd be wrong. Yesterday as my author page filled up with congratulations on the release of The Girl of Diamonds & Rust, there felt like no distance at all. An intense virtual connection that felt good, really good. I talk about all kinds of things with my readers. I'm chatty that way. Kids. Work. Husbands. The usual girl world convo. Those are the good times. But they never last. It's the first thing I learned as an Indie Author. Wait for the boom.

So this morning boom, boom, boom, little hits today that makes the distance not feel vast enough. Releasing a book for a writer is like strapping yourself in on an emotional roller coaster. It's like dating that guy you really like who won't commit. It's like...oh well, you get the point. But with all the ups and downs, the glowing moments and the booms, I wouldn't have passed on this last year for anything. It is nice to still dream when you should be sitting on a patio chair staring at the ocean. So, even for the booms, I thank you for the journey.

As ever, I wish you Peace as I count down to my 1 year anniversary with all of you.


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